effortless action

it is my effort to contribute to the influence of my humility. to not take myself so seriously.
it is not for the feeding of happiness or gratification but the service of intuitive artifact; an element of balance. balance that i believe is embodied in vague and dynamic mediums. continual mediums; undescribed, unconfirmed, fleeting, and changing.

i have been in those states of balance. i have felt them around me. in me. a presence of those dynamic rhythms.

i wait too often however; lazy and preoccupied with nonsense littlery and maybeness. but the moments are upon me, at least i identify them as "the moments." those of relative distinguishible change, and notably, change towards a more experienced balance. i can feel this. though, over the last week or so, i've lost a bit of the momentum i started, in my mind or heart i feel the immediacy. that current of continual flow. that stuff that i've been observing and gathering for so long but never having truly followed myself.

one step in front of the other. one at a time. continual, persistent. discipline.

but i think about the way human intellect phrases and frames things for the purpose of understanding and communication. a vehicle. a medium.
ultimately it is in the is-ness that things exist and not in the defining or understanding of them. they are without so much understanding or category. regardless of human.
because i think of the "journey" and the "steps" and "obstacles" and it appears to me that the individual never really moves; that intellectual constructs of layer and perception, or context and experience, project the mirrored-kaleidoscope sphere of influence we generally believe in.

basically: i(we) try too hard. we are "gifted" with a balance. born with it. intuition built of experience, information. so simplistic. but our attributes are tested by natural selection/evolution. what will out? what will persist and survive through adaptation? we are too momentary to ultimately decide that. we live the balance and existence will hold the almanac.